#402, 734 - 2nd Ave. NW,
All these competitor wannabe artists out there. Theo's been quiet for a few days. He better have been PAINTING. Some real paintings. Ross if Theo is gonna be in the fraternity of real artists we gotta keep him monitored and on track or we'll have to sign him up for manditory ART-A-NON classes.
All righty, fine. Truman, I have been experimenting. I wanted to see if using my dick as a brush produced more interesting textural strokes. “Strokes” - that could be a pun. Unfortunately I’m not a punny kind of guy. Puny, maybe. Anyway, long story short, with the exception of Friday to Sunday being a kind of liver stress test weekend I have determined that one’s dick is not a great painting tool. Everything turned out “piss poor”. Sorry, the puns just keep cumming. Ewww…So as a result I had to find out if it (my dick) could at least be used as a contact cement applicator. It can’t. Now I am in the hospital explaining how my dick came to be glued to my stomach. Apparently, dry plus dry equals stick. I am going to have to remember to read instruction and precaution manuals more diligently. Who knew? I never had to read a software manual before. Mind you, they were only PageMaker 2.0 and Illustrator 3.0. They’ve progressed since then you say? But what will I do with my IIci? I know, I’ll glue it to my stomach to keep my dick company…theoA lower case ART GOD with technical problems
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